Life is a balance between maintaining a strong connection to ourselves and a strong connection to others. Human beings need relationships for survival. When we lack healthy attachments to others in our life or find ourselves repeating negative relationship patterns over and over our relationships can bring us pain instead of being a source of connection.
In the healthiest of scenarios, our relationships help us feel safe, strong, inspired, comfortable, secure. They give us a place of refuge in the world; a place to feel grounded and at home. They inspire us to be the best person we can be, to grow, and give us the space to take chances while knowing our loved ones have our back.
Some of the ways that I work on deeper connection in relationships are:
- Deep exploration of values, needs, and desires.
- Examining and identifying repetitive relationship patterns.
- Exploring typical role(s) played in relationships.
- Reviewing attachment styles and history.
- Developing assertiveness and boundary setting skills.
- Working on healthy communication skills.
- Healing past hurts that may impair healthy connection to others.
- Addressing and examining fears about conflict, anger, trust, and intimacy.
- Letting go of perfectionism, shame, passive aggressiveness, and aggressiveness.
- Education about boundaries and boundary setting.
- Developing mindfulness and anxiety management skills.
- Discovering how past experiences have shaped patterns of thinking, feeling, and behavior.
- Increasing self compassion and love.
- Examining and challenging fears about worthiness and ability to be your true self.
Some of the presenting concerns that individuals describe when contacting me are:
- Difficulty trusting the self and others.
- Feeling angry and irritable most of the time.
- Feeling broken, unlovable, filled with shame.
- Trouble making or maintaining relationships.
- Having a hard time finding the love you want/deserve.
- Pattern of infidelity (either on the part of self or on the part of partners).
- History of abusive (emotional, verbal, physical, sexual) relationships.
- Pattern of attracting the wrong partner and/or friendships.
- Trouble asserting him/herself.
- Physical symptoms unrelated to medical conditions (stomachaches, headaches, body aches/pains, fatigue, muscle tension).
- Feeling stuck.
- Feeling drained and resentful most of the time.
- Having difficulty being honest and open in relationships.
- Fear of abandonment and loss.
- Past relationship(s) are impacting present.
- Engaging in numbing behaviors such as eating, drinking, shopping, too much time online, gambling, cutting, etc.
If you feel like your relationships are not providing the comfort and inspiration that you require or you feel disconnected from others in your life, please contact me.